I don't have anything particularly profound to say today. Most of my active yearly reflection happened over the last few weeks.
Some updates from last week:
- I ordered a shirt from Redbubble and am pleased-ish with the result. This is promising.
- I decided, begrudgingly, to focus on baking and holiday prep last week instead of commissions. I was, and am, burnt out.
This week I decided to adopt a whatever-the-fuck approach. No scheduling, no obligations, no "I have to finish this by x day"—I'm just going to attempt to do what I feel like doing when I feel like doing it. This, as we've discussed, is more difficult than it sounds. I'll see where it takes me. I'm not saying I'm "off" this week; but I'm also not forcing anything.
I don't know what 2021 is going to bring. If the last 5 months of business ownership have taught me anything, it's that plans change. I'm not sure what that means. I think it means that it's ok to pivot. I'm not sure if I should try to focus more—but I'm just so damn tired of trying to force everything. I crave lightness and ease.
Some thoughts and bastardizations of quotes I'll be taking with me into the new year:
- (Thanks to old proverbs) Be like water. For once, it would be nice to flow around obstacles instead of bashing my head against them.
- (Thanks to life experience + Mark Manson) Nothing is as good or as bad as it seems in my head. Everything is extra-medium.
- (Thanks to Nicole Antoinette) What if this were easy?
- (Thanks to Big Magic) Curiosity over passion.
- (Thanks to literally everyone) Done is better than perfect.
- (Thanks to the movie Soul) Don't confuse your "spark" with your "purpose." Excessive focus on one thing, even if viewed as a vocation, robs you of the ability to enjoy simply living. This is a good companion to "curiosity over passion."
I feel hopeful. I don't know why or toward what really, but I feel like 2021 will be good for everyone—if we let it.